super accurate zodiac

aries: makes ppl upset on purpose cause they think its funny. it usually is pretty funny. cool at parties.
taurus: one track mind. chill out some time damn?
gemini: im scared of you but keep doing what you doing
cancer: have u tried yoga
leo: loyal and super fuckin smart but a dick. u probably bottle up your emotions cause you got a brand to maintain
virgo: plays league too much
libra: youre really gay. keep being gay.
scorpio: not as much of a dick as everyone says. you just don’t open up right away. leos think youre cool probably
sagittarius: you need…. a nap
capricorn: vsry kind but also sometimes a downer. turn up some time capricorn. ur friends wanna see u smile
aquarius: ur always fixing shit? in your spare time you steal peoples souls and sell them back for billions of dollars
pisces: mom friend